Some more Pet Peeves, cos I know you’ve been on tenterhooks waiting…

1. Tamara Ecclestone. Featured in the ‘What I See in The Mirror’ in The Guardian (30/6/12)

She may see her mother when she looks in the mirror. The rest of us see a vacuous, stratospherically over-privileged, self-centred doll. Her eyes are devoid of any spark of feeling and her face; regularly treated with Baby Botox (how cute! – does it come with matching bootees?) and its layers of paint will never show a whit of humanity. I wish she’d not been given the oxygen of publicity.

2. Loops

As in those silly little ribbons manufacturers put in women’s tops, even T-shirty tops. What tend to happen is they protrude out of the top when you’re wearing it. Worse still, it’s one of those single strips of ribbon across the back. Yes, you cut them off  but what is their purpose? Are these supposed to be something you hang them up with? Here’s an idea, why don’t I hang the top up ON A HANGER? There we are, problem solved.

3. Ostentatious Driving

Usually committed by men, this one, sad to say. The sort of person who drives a souped up, noisy engined car and who takes a great deal of effort to get in front of you (nearly taking your wing mirror off in the process), only to turn off the road 100 yards later. Would it have killed you sir, to have ‘dawdled’ behind me driving at, ooh here’s an idea – ‘the speed limit’ for about ten seconds? No, and it would be safer all round.

4. Dastardly herbs

You know when you’ve got your herbs all chopped and waiting on the board ready to garnish your food and turn it from something ordinary into something Nigella can have an orgasm about…? Then you realise you’ve eaten your food and forgotten to put them on.

5. Supermarket Travails

In true BOGOF fashion, here’s a buy 2, get 1 free peeve!

a. You make a shopping list and leave it at home

b.You take shopping bags and leave them in the car

c. People who do not put the divider thing on the conveyer at the checkout and then defiantly face the other way when you reach over (in best theatrical fashion) to get it and place it on the belt. Why do they not do that? It’s just rude.

d. Ooh, here’s another one to prove I can’t count and this is a counting one – the supermarkets who wow you with their special offers and when you look at the tiny print, see you are paying 1p less to buy more of what you didn’t especially need. Obesity epidemic anyone…?